Phyllis Diller: Opening Comedy Doors

Phyllis Diller (1917-2012) died Monday at the age of 95. She began her comedy career after age 40. I first remember her as a kid, when I was allowed to stay up and watch Ed Sullivan. Who was this woman waving a cigarette holder, hair looking electrocuted, with an infectious cackle, and a husband named Fang?

She was hilarious with great lines, superb delivery, and self deprecating humor. She opened the comedy door for women. A lot of comedy is in the act, but when I read some of her lines, they stood on their own. I appreciate good writing and a chuckle. Hope these make you smile and remember a funny lady.

My husband fell in a river right in front of me and drowned. I rushed to the bank but he had already withdrawn all his money.

A terrible thing happened to me last night again - nothing

The only thing my husband and I have in common is that we were married on the same day.

Whatever you may look like, marry a man of your own age: as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

Book Review: My Formerly Hot Life

The subtitle for My Formerly Hot Life by Stephanie Dolgoff is Dispatches from just the Other Side of Young. The title caught my eye and the writing struck my funny bone. When the author's on a train and a good looking man asks for the time and that's truly all he wants is the time, Ms. Dolgoff realizes that something has shifted in her life and she's not sure that she likes it. While she's happily married and has children, it dawned on her that somehow you have crossed an invisible line: You are not young, relevant, in the mix woman you used to be. But neither are you old, or even what you think of as middle aged. You are no longer what you were, and not quite sure what you are.  (book jacket blurb)

Indeed, friendships, fashion, beauty, body image, and marriage are topics for her wit and insight. She discusses formerly thin, formerly cool, fomerly carefree, and how so much that seemed important in the twenties is looked upon fondly. However, being comfortable and content and not up on the latest club scene makes sense now. Her chapter on three friends trying to coordinate a "girls night out" is hilarious. The recovery time from "fun" takes so much longer as a formerly.

P. 104 on swimsuits: I tried a few tankinis which are like assisted-living facilities you go to before you need the round-the-clock nursing home type care of the Miraclesuit.

p.155 on having a fit: I operated under the mistaken belief that I had a designated numerical size , which was usually two sizes smaller than my actual body, and it was my full-time job to try to make my body fit into 'my size'. I could have simply bought bigger clothes.

As a Formerly, I no longer labor under this truly cruel misconception.

Jacket blurb: while you may no longer be as close to the media-machine generated idea of fabulous, you can do many, many more things fabulously.

My Formerly Hot Life is a light quick read and relevant for all women - those who were a formerly and those approaching formerly, and yes, the young ladies who can't imagine they'll ever be a formerly. Laughs all around.

New Book: Fifty Shades of Greyskull

Poor Teela

Book Review: Bossypants

I'm late to the Bossypants by Tina Fey party. However, I saw this at the library and snatched it up, then proceeded to read it in two days. My husband often had to leave the room, as I was snorting, giggling, and laughing to the point of hysteria. Perhaps it was the bad haircut picture, but I could identify with Tina Fey's childhood, and her clear discussion of dorkiness.

I watched on television when she won the Mark Twain award for humor. Indeed, she basically said, "How can I win this when I had a happy childhood?" She was the youngest child and obviously accustomed to being around adults, being the center of attention, and seeing the world in quirky fashion.

From Chicago's Second City to New York's Saturday Night Live, Tina Fey has brought verve and nuance to the world of sketch humor. She's just so darn clever. And the movie Mean Girls is a gem.

Here's one excerpt from Bossypants that had me rolling: page 104 
My mother knew the importance of getting the right fit for a bra, so she took me to JC Penney and tried one on over my clothes. She tried a bra on me over my clothes in the middle of JC Penney. I thank her for this. This early breast-related humiliation prevented me from ever needing to participate in "Girls Gone Wild" in my twenties.

Absolutely hilarious read from start to finish.

Movie Review: Bridesmaids

Posted in The Little Paper of San Saba. I am the movie critic - hurrah! (The town does not have a theater - ha)

This movie critic gives Bridesmaids an A and a F. Stick with me folks. Here's some dialogue and description of the movie experience, plus an inner monologue (that'll be in italics).
Cast -Joanne Faries (JF) your critic. Linda T (LT) friend and moviegoer. Joanne's husband Ray declined this movie - genius fellow.

Email - day of movie:
JF: So, see you at 4:15 in the lobby. Looking forward to seeing Bridesmaids.
LT: Absolutely. Ready for some laughs and it's received good reviews in EW and newspapers (Shows how much they know)

1/4 of the way thru the movie:
LT leans over: I'm so sorry I picked this.
JF whispers: It's okay. I'd read there were gross parts. Just not our style. (Reader - keep in mind most viewers were howling as the bridesmaids, after a brazilian lunch, are now barfing on bridesmaid dresses, each other, and they are pooping in their pants. Ugh. Double Ugh. Not funny)

JF: Much better. Kristen Wiig, as Annie, has some great lines. Here where she's trying to one-up a new friend/bridesmaid (Rose Byrne, who's gorgeous) is cringeworthy but humorous. Maya Rudolph, as the bride-to-be is awesome. She has understated talent and soulful eyes).

LT and JF: We are laughing out loud at Jon Hamm (from Mad Men). He's so good looking and he plays such a jerk in this flick. Annie keeps coming back to him and he just puts her down. Wants her to leave after sex. Won't agree to go to the wedding with her. Ultimately she's third choice. Any scene with him is sadly pathetically humorous.

mid movie:
LT: Oh dear
JF: It's okay. (So, it's the bridal shower at the rich friend's home and it is absolutely over-the-top crazy. Well, Annie snaps. Funny at first, but then the scene goes ridiculously stupidly nuts. It's a shame that Kristen Wiig thought this was worthy of her talent)

post movie:
LT: I'm never picking a movie again.
JF: Yes, you are. There were a lot of clever lines.

Summary:
Bridesmaids is Hangover for women. That's a shame, in my opinion (though I liked Hangover for what it was at the time, but no need to duplicate). I wish the women in charge had been so much smarter. Great cast. Awesome lines. And then stupid toilet humor. Ugh. The parts with real feelings, real friendships, real long-term deep emotions were SO good. They resonated with me.

The concept of Annie hitting bottom and then going even lower was well handled. These are all women who aren't kids and the movie, when it explores some of these depths, is absolute gold. But when it goes for the cheap laughs ... it cheapens itself. Now the dollars are speaking at the box office, so I know nothing. However, I do know I'm disappointed. Bridesmaids could have been SO MUCH BETTER.

See you at the movies ... matinee, that is ...

Humorous Mystery

See a picture of a casket and think, "Huh, is this book going to be depressing?"

See that the author is Susan Isaacs and think, "Well, this'll be funny with a twist."

Sure enough, As Husbands Go, is a witty mystery laden with Isaacs' usual memorable characters. Susie Gersten, happily married to Jonah, a plastic surgeon, has a great life. Her floral business is good, her four year-old triplets are healthy and keep her busy, and she has a husband who loves her.

Or does he?

He's not home when the triplets wake her one morning. No messages, no notes, no nothing. Nobody's heard from him. She notifies the police and her world is upended when they arrive to tell her Jonah's been found dead in a call girl's apartment. It looks like the escort killed him. Susie's life is now headlines in all of the New York papers. Her wealthy in-laws are stricken, and Susie is in shock. Had she missed clues, how could Jonah have sought "companionship" elsewhere? There has to be more to this story. And of course, there is and you'll want to keep reading to follow Susie on her road to recovery and discovery.

Talking about Susie's mother: p.73 She was belligerently unattractive, almost as if she'd been created in the late sixties by a male-chauvanist cartoonist as a malicious caricature of a feminist.

p.123 In regards to what people must be thinking: Or that someone like me had managed to score a privileged attractive-charming-gifted-successful Yale doctor only because he was one deeply twisted dude.

p. 140 Susie's grandmother says, "I can smell a lousy marriage a mile away. Anyone's, not just the three stinkos I wound up with. But yours, it smelled like a rose."

p.253 I tried to tune him out while I had a triangle of turkey and avocado and a bite of a grilled vegetable with hummus wrap that tasted like something you regret buying at an airport. ( I love that description.)

You won't regret reading As Husbands Go.

Laugh Riot Read

My sister introduced me to Jen Lancaster's writing and I'm hooked. I'm also envious. Her style is my style only on steroids. Funny, snarky, colorful - her sentences are laugh out loud snortingly hysterical, and her footnotes are not boring.

Pretty in Plaid follows her life in fashion - through Girl Scout days, Jordache jeans in the eighties, and the ubiquitous navy suit for all upcoming career gals. Yes, comparisons to the Love Boat are made, and slowly Jen works her way in shoes to almost the Manolos. I laughed out loud as she, the political science major, realizes college never prepared her for collating and faxing. How do these machines work?

If you are looking for a light summer read and chuckles galore, I recommend author Jen Lancaster's collection:

Bitter is the New Black: Confessions of a condescending egomaniacal, self-centered smart-ass, or why you should never carry a Prada bag to the unemployment office.

Bright Lights, Big Ass

Such a Pretty Fat

and her latest, which I have not read yet: My Fair Lazy

Enjoy!

(Her blog is funny too: http://www.jennsylvania.com/ )

Label pin gate - the real story