On August 1 Olympic beefcake Ryan Lochte applied to trademark “jeah” — a word he may or may not have made up himself, but that appears in # form all over his Twitter feed and Lochte-branded merchandise. He's apparently doing this so that he can merchandise more crap. Ahead, some ideas for him.
Jeah Nail Art
Ryan will want to capitalize on his female fan base by offering some special things just for the ladies. What better way to get them to love him even more (like, so that they spend money on his JEAH nonsense) than starting a JEAH nail art craze?
Suggested price: $8.99 for each set of stickers, which will ideally be made available at most major drug stores.
Jeah Goggles
You know, like beer goggles. Unisex.
Suggested price: $14.99. They should be the new version of those plastic neon shades that bars hand out way too much these days.
Jeah Grill
He would obviously be remiss not to include some sparkly dentures.
Suggested price: $1,299. The high/low mix thing is very "now" and could work nicely in Ryan's product line.
Jeah Kitty Litter
Because cats demand the best, too.
Suggested price: $16.99, which may seem high but at least lets you know you're getting something special.
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